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| − | ==Lyrics== | + | __NOTOC__ |
| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
| + | ==Versions of this Song== |
| − | <p> The adventures of GREGGERY PECCARY! </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Oh, here comes GREGGERY,<br>
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| − | Little GREGGERY PECCARY<br>
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| − | The nocturnal gregarious<br>
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| − | Wild swine . . . </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>A peccary is a little pig with a white collar that usually hangs around between
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| − | Texas and Paraguay, sometimes ranging as far west as Catalina </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Catalina, Catalina, Catalina! </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>This particular peccary is part of that bold . . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Bold . . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> New . . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>New . . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Breed . . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Breeding . . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>That distinguishes itself by markings which resemble a WIDE TIE directly
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| − | below the white collar </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>If it's wide enough<br>
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| − | Everyone will know<br>
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| − | That the tie I'm wearing<br>
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| − | Is a symbol<br>
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| − | Of how nimble my mind will know<br>
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| − | Ooh-ooh! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>(Swank suave!) </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Hoon-hoon hoonna-han<br>
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| − | Hoonna hoonna </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Look out!<br>
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| − | Here he comes again! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Oh here comes GREGGERY PECCARY </p>
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| − | <p>Yes it's cravy, cravy, yeah . . . </p>
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| − | <p>Hoonna-han<br>
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| − | Hoonna-han </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Every morning, GREGGERY drives his little red Volkswagen to the ugly part
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| − | of town where they keep the Government Buildings. </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p><i>Voodn, Voodn!</i> </p>
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| − | <p> Boy it's so hard to find a place to park around here! </p>
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| − | <p>Voo-voo-voo-nya-hoon </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> GREGGERY PECCARY takes the elevator up to the eighty-third floor of a grim,
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| − | gray, evil-looking building with a sign on the front reading: <b>'BIG SWIFTY
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| − | & ASSOCIATES, TREND-MONGERS'</b>. </p>
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| − | <p>And what, might you ask, is a TREND MONGER? Well, a TREND MONGER is a person
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| − | who dreams up a TREND (like <b>'The Twist'</b> ---or <b>'Flower Power'</b>),
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| − | and spreads it throughout the land, using all the frightening little skills
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| − | that Science has made available! </p>
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| − | <p>And so it was, one fateful morning, GREGGERY PECCARY made his way through
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| − | the Steno Pool . . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Hi Mildred!<br>
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| − | Hello Gladys!<br>
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| − | WANDA! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> Yes, from the moment they laid eyes on him, all the girls in the BIG SWIFTY
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| − | Steno Pool <b>KNEW</b> . . . here was a nocturnal, gregarious wild swine <b>ON
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| − | HIS WAY UP</b> . . . a PECCARY of Destiny, Adventure and <b>ROMANCE</b> .
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| − | . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Is there any mail for me? </p>
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| − | <p><b>Stenographers:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>SWIFTY'S!<br>
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| − | THIS IS BIG SWIFTY'S!<br>
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| − | AT BIG SWIFTY'S WE ALL KNOW-OW-OW<br>
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| − | (WO-WO)<br>
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| − | YOU'LL GO<br>
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| − | FOR ANY GIMMICK OR GIZMO! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>WOULDN'T YOU RATHER BE INVOLVED<br>
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| − | IN A SERIES OF COLORFUL<br>
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| − | TIME-WASTING <b>TRENDS</b>? </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>AIR HOCKEY . . . biff . . . dush-h-h! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Stenographers:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA<br>
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| − | YOUP YOUP YOUP YOUP </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>IS YOUR WIFE SNORING BY THE SINK? </p>
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| − | <p><b>Stenographers:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA<br>
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| − | YOUP YOUP YOUP YOUP </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>AIN'T YOUR LIFE BORING, DON'TCHA THINK? </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Stenographers:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> YOUP YOUP YOUP-YOUP-YOUP YOUP YOUP </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>LIFE IS SO MUCH BETTER<br>
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| − | WHEN THERE'S SOME LITTLE SOMETHING<br>
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| − | TO DO! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> Does it matter that this waste of time is what makes a LIFE for you? Hmmmmm?
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| − | </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>I must plummet boldly forward to my ultra-avant laminated, simulated replica-mahogany
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| − | desk, with the strategically-placed, imported, very hip water pipe, and the
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| − | latest edition of the WHOLE EARTH CATALOG, and rack my agile mind for a spectacular
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| − | new <b>TREND</b>, thereby rejuvenating our limping economy, and providing
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| − | for bored & miserable people everywhere some great new <b>'THING'</b>
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| − | to identify with! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Stenographers:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>WE HAVE GOT THE LITTLE ANSWERS<br>
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| − | TO THE THINGS<br>
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| − | THAT MIGHT BE BOTHERING YOU! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>WE HAVE GOT YOUR LITTLE TOYS! </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Stenographers:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>(WE'RE BUSY MAKIN' 'EM!)<br>
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| − | BUSY MAKIN' 'EM,<br>
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| − | WE'RE BUSY MAKIN' 'EM </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> BUSY MAKIN' EM </p>
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| − | <p><b>Stenographers:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>JUST FOR YOU! <br>
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| − | Yoo-hoo-hoo! </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> Highly efficient, Miss Snodgrass! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>And with that, GREGGERY turned and strode nonchalantly into his dinky little
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| − | office with the desk and the catalog and the very hip water pipe, and proceeded,
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| − | with a vigor and determination known only to piglets of a similarly diminutive
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| − | proportion, to single-handedly invent <b>THE CALENDAR!</b> </p>
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| − | <p> With his eyes rolled heaven-ward, and his little shiny pig-hoofs on the
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| − | desk, GREGGERY ponders the question of <b>ETERNITY (and fractional divisions
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| − | thereof)</b>, as mysterious ANGELIC VOICES sing to him from a great distance,
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| − | providing the necessary clues for the construction of this thrilling new <b>TREND!</b>
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| − | </p>
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| − | <p><b>Angelic Voices:</b> </p>
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| − | <p><b><i>SUNDAY</i></b> </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Sunday?<br>
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| − | WOW!<br>
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| − | SUNDAY, SATURDAY . . . TUESDAY THROUGH<br>
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| − | 'MONDAY - MONDAY'!<br>
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| − | SUNDAY, SATURDAY </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>And thus THE CALENDAR, in all of its colorful disguises was presented to
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| − | the bored & miserable people everywhere! </p>
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| − | <p>GREGGERY issued a memo on it, whereupon the entire contents of the Steno
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| − | Pool identified with it <b>STRENUOUSLY</b>, and WORSHIPPED IT as a WAY OF
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| − | LIFE, and took their little pills by it, and went back 'n forth from work
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| − | by it, and paid their rent by it, and before long they were even having BIRTHDAY
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| − | PARTIES IN THE OFFICE by it, because NOW, AT LAST, GREGGERY PECCARY's exciting
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| − | new invention had made it possible for everyone to find out <b>HOW OLD THEY
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| − | WERE!</b> </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>What hath GOD wrought? </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Unfortunately, there were some people who simply DID NOT WISH TO KNOW, and
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| − | that's why, on his way home from the office one night, GREGGERY was attacked
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| − | by a <b>RAGE OF HUNCHMEN!</b> </p>
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| − | <p> Making his way through the evening traffic, GREGGERY notices that the other
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| − | vehicles which crowd and bump his little red car are all inhabited by slowly-aging
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| − | 'VERY HIP YOUNG PEOPLE.' </p>
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| − | <p>They appear to be casting sinister glances toward him through their glinting
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| − | acid burn-out eyeballs, trying to run him off the road, or make him bump into
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| − | something . . . giving strong evidence of <b>HOSTILE AGGRESSION!</b> </p>
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| − | <p> To elude them, GREGGERY takes the SHORT FOREST EXIT off the expressway.
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| − | They zoom after him in all manner of cars, trucks, garishly-painted buses,
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| − | and motorcycles. </p>
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| − | <p> GREGGERY takes a bumpy trail off the main SHORT FOREST ROAD, which leads
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| − | him up the side of a FAMOUS (and conveniently placed) MOUNTAIN, and into a
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| − | strange cave on the edge of a cliff, not far from a LITTLE TWISTED TREE .
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| − | . . with eyes on it. </p>
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| − | <p>Meanwhile, the enraged HUNCHMEN (and HUNCH-WOMEN) rumble through the SHORT
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| − | FOREST until (realizing the little swine has escaped), they decide to park
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| − | their steaming vehicles in a circular pseudo-Wagon Train formation . . . and
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| − | have a <b>LOVE-IN!</b> </p>
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| − | <p> Under the influence of a fantastic amount of TRENDY CHEMICAL AMUSEMENT AID,
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| − | they proceed to perform lewd acts, rip each other off for small personal possessions,
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| − | and dance with depraved abandon in the vicinity of a six-foot pile of transistor
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| − | radios (each one tuned to a different station). </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>WHAT? </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>The HUNCHMEN finally expire from exhaustion, and GREGGERY, who has viewed
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| − | the proceedings from a safe distance, breathes a sigh of relief . . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Phew! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> Only to be terrified once again by a roar of immense laughter . . . </p>
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| − | <p><b>Billy:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>HO! HO! HO! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Which seems to be rumbling up from the very depths of the cave in which he
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| − | has hidden his car! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Good Lord! What was that? </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> GREGGERY doesn't realize he has concealed himself inside the very mouth
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| − | of </p>
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| − | <p><b>Billy:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>HO! HO! HO! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p><b>BILLY THE MOUNTAIN!</b> </p>
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| − | <p><b>Billy:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>HO! HO! HO! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> And, as you all know, whenever BILLY laughs, rocks and boulders hack up,
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| − | and the air for miles around is filled with tons of dust, forming a series
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| − | of huge <b>BROWN CLOUDS!</b> </p>
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| − | <p><b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>WHO IS MAKING THOSE NEW BROWN CLOUDS?<br>
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| − | WHO IS MAKING THOSE CLOUDS THESE DAYS?<br>
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| − | WHO IS MAKING THOSE NEW BROWN CLOUDS?<br>
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| − | BETTER ASK A <b>PHILOSTOPHER</b> 'N SEE WHAT HE SAYS! </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>GREGGERY stops at a gas station and makes a mysterious phone call . . . </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>IS THIS THE OLD LOFT<br>
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| − | WITH THE PAINT PEELIN' OFF IT<br>
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| − | BY THE CHINESE POLICE<br>
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| − | WHERE THE DOGS ROLL BY? </p>
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| − | <p> IS THIS WHERE THEY KEEP<br>
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| − | THE PHILOSTOPHERS NOW,<br>
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| − | WITH THE RUGS & THE DUST,<br>
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| − | WHERE THE BOOKS GO TO DIE? </p>
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| − | <p> HOW MANY YEZ GOT?<br>
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| − | SAY YEZ GOT QUITE A FEW,<br>
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| − | JUST SITTIN' AROUND THERE<br>
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| − | WITH NOTHIN' TO DO? </p>
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| − | <p> WELL I JUST CALLED YEZ UP<br>
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| − | 'CAUSE I WANTED TO SEE<br>
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| − | A <b>PHILOSTOPHER</b> BE<br>
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| − | OF ASSISTANCE TO ME! </p>
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| − | <p><b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p> GREGGERY receives information that <i><b>'The Greatest Living PHILOSTOPHER
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| − | Known to Mankind'</b></i> is currently in possession of the very information
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| − | in question, and, furthermore, this information could be HIS, if only GREGGERY
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| − | would attend a <b>'SPECIAL THERAPEUTIC GROUP ASSEMBLY'</b> (Classes now forming),
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| − | and available at a special low low introductory fee . . . and now, here he
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| − | is, 'The Greatest Living PHILOSTOPHER Known to Mankind', <b>QUENTIN ROBERT
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| − | DeNAMELAND!</b> Take it away! </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Quentin:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Folks, as you can see for yourself, the way this clock over here is behaving,
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| − | <b>TIME IS OF AFFLICTION!</b> Now this might be cause for alarm among a portion
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| − | of you, as, from a certain experience, I TEND TO PROCLAIM: <b>'THE EONS ARE
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| − | CLOSING'!</b> </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Narrator:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>Make your checks payable to <b>'QUENTIN ROBERT DeNAMELAND, <i>Greatest Living
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| − | Philostopher Known to Mankind</i>'!</b> </p>
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| − | <p> <b>Greggery:</b> </p>
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| − | <p>WHO IS MAKING THOSE NEW BROWN CLOUDS?<br>
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| − | WHO IS MAKING THOSE CLOUDS THESE DAYS?<br>
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| − | WHO IS MAKING THOSE NEW BROWN CLOUDS?<br>
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| − | IF YOU ASK A <b>PHILOSTOPHER</b>, HE'LL SEE<br>
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| − | THAT YOU PAYS! </p>
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| | | | |
| − | ==Players On This Song== | + | ===''Zappa Wazoo'' version=== |
| − | * [[Frank Zappa]] - percussion | + | * [[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary: Movement I]] |
| − | * [[George Duke]] - keyboards | + | * [[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary: Movement II]] |
| − | * [[Bruce Fowler]] - all brass | + | * [[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary: Movement III]] |
| − | * [[James Youman]] - bass | + | * [[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary: Movement IV - The New Brown Clouds]] |
| − | * [[Ruth Underwood]] - percussion
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| − | * [[Chad Wackerman]] - drum overdubs
| |
| | | | |
| − | ==Records On Which This Song Has Appeared==
| |
| | | | |
| − | ===Zappa Albums=== | + | ===''Joe's Domage'' version=== |
| − | *[[Studio Tan]] | + | * [[When It's Perfect...]] |
| − | *[[Läther]] | + | * [[The New Brown Clouds (1972 - unknown)]] |
| − | *[[Zappa Wazoo]] (instrumental version) as:
| + | * [[Blessed Relief / The New Brown Clouds]] |
| − | **[[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary: Movement I]]
| |
| − | **[[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary: Movement II]]
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| − | **[[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary: Movement III]]
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| − | **[[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary: Movement IV - The New Brown Clouds]]
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| | | | |
| − | ===Tribute & Cover Albums===
| |
| − | *[[Greggery Peccary & Other Persuasions]]
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| − | *[[Nasal Retentive Orchestra]]: [[Music For Hungry People]] as [[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary|Greggery Peccary]]
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| | | | |
| − | ==Notes About This Song== | + | ===''Läther'' version=== |
| − | ==CC Clues In This Song==
| + | * [[The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary (1975 - Record Plant & UCLA)]] |
| | | | |
| − | *The lyrics mention [[Cars (CC)|cars]] and [[Motorcycles (CC)|motorcycles]] ("They zoom after him in all manner of '''cars, trucks, garishly-painted buses and motorcycles'''.")
| + | [[Category:Fictional characters|Adventures Of Greggery Peccary]] |
| − | *"[[Big Swifty]]" (as in '''"BIG SWIFTY & ASSOCIATES, TREND-MONGERS"''') is the title of a song on the ''[[Waka/Jawaka]]'' album.
| + | [[Category:Animals|Adventures Of Greggery Peccary]] |
| − | *The lyrics make reference to [[Billy The Mountain (CC)|Billy the Mountain and his wife Ethel the Tree]].
| |
| − | *There are also references to the [[Short Forest (CC)|Short Forest]] ("'''Short Forest Exit''' off the express way", "a bumpy trail off the main '''Short Forest Road'''", etc).
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| − | | |
| − | [[Category:Tracks|Adventures Of Greggery Peccary, The]]
| |
| − | [[Category:Them Or Us (The List)|Adventures Of Greggery Peccary, The]] | |
| − | [[Category:The Real Frank Zappa Book (The List)|Adventures Of Greggery Peccary, The]] | |
