Difference between revisions of "The Talking Asshole"

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FZ read [[The Talking Asshole]] section from [[William Burroughs]]' book [[Naked Lunch]] at The Nova Convention, New York, December 2, 1978.  The book had been published in France in 1959 but was not published in the USA until 1962 after an obscenity trial.  The book has a character called Willie The Disk.
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__NOTOC__
[[Image:Burroughs zappa.jpg|right|thumb|William Burroughs and FZ]]
 
<blockquote>The Nova Convention took place on November 30, December 1, and December 2, 1978, with the principal performances being held on the last two days at the Entermedia Theater, on Second Avenue and Twelfth Street, which had in the fifties been the fabled Phoenix Theater. Attending were an odd mixture of academics, publishers, writers, artists, punk rockers, counterculture groupies, and an influx of bridge-and-tunnel kids drawn by Keith Richards, who made the event a sellout. . .
 
  
Saturday night the Entermedia was packed, largely with young people waiting to see Keith Richards. There was a small hitch, however, which was that Keith Richards had cancelled. He was having problems as the result of a heroin bust in Toronto, and his office convinced him that appearing on the same program with Burroughs was bad publicity.
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==Lyrics==
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(The following lyrics are from a recording of FZ reading from [[William S. Burroughs]]' novel [[Naked Lunch]] at [[The Nova Convention: Entermedia Theater, Dec 1978]]);
  
But the show had to go on, and the composer Philip Glass, playing one of his repetitive pieces on the synthesizer, was thrown to the wolves. The disappointed kids who wanted Keith Richards shouted and booed. Then Brion Gysin went on amid cries of "Where's Keith?" and found himself hoping that the riot would not start until he had done his brief turn.
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'''Master of Ceremonies''' [Identity unknown]: Just sending up for the great... uh, Frank Zappa.
  
In a last-minute effort, James Grauerholz had recruited Frank Zappa to pinch-hit for Keith. He volunteered to read the "talking asshole" routine from Naked Lunch. But as Zappa was preparing to go on, Patti Smith had a fit of pique about following him. James did his best to make peace, saying "Frank has come in at the last minute, and he's got to go on, and he's doing it for William, not to show you up." Patti Smith retreated to the privacy of her dressing room, and Zappa got a big hand, because that's what they wanted, a rock star.  
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[Audience cheers, mixed with some vague yells of "We want Keith"]...
</blockquote><div align=right>(from Literary Outlaw: The Life and Times of William S. Burroughs by Ted Morgan, New York: 1978)</div>
 
  
FZ suggested to [[William Burroughs|Burroughs]] that they should produce a musical version of [[Naked Lunch]], although they often discussed it it never happened. They remained friends and FZ sent a dozen roses to [[William Burroughs|Burroughs]] for his 70th birthday in 1984.
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'''FZ:''' Hiya. How you doin' tonight? Alright,...um, as you know...I'm not the kind of a person that reads books, I've said this before many times, I'm not fond of reading. But, I do. I have in the past made exceptions, and...uh, one of these exceptions was this part of...uh the...the book that, I'm sure you know, called ''[[Naked Lunch]]'', [audience cheers] and I've received permission to read the part about The Talking Asshole. [audience cheers]
  
FZ's contribution can be found [http://www.kilbot.net/writing/asshole.php online] and was issued on LP and reissued on CD:
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So...[audience cheers]...Before I do...uh, I've discussed with Mr. Burroughs - before we came out here - some of the details that led to the construction of this section of the book. I asked him where he got the idea for this part, and he said that it was derived from the ventriloquist scene in ''The [[Dead Of Night]]'', if you know that film. And I had a little bit of trouble following that, for a moment there, until he made it all very clear to me by saying that... uh, it was like... uh, when you have a ventriloquist dummy and suddenly the dummy starts talking for you. And so, with that introduction, I start on page 132, and it goes like this [clears throat]...
  
[[The Nova Convention]] (2LP, Giorno Poetry Systems GPS 014-015, June 18, 1979)
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Did I ever tell you about the man who taught his asshole to talk? His whole abdomen would move up and down, you dig? Farting out the words. It was unlike anything I ever heard. This 'ass-talk' had a sort of gut frequency. It hit you right down there, like you gotta go. [audience laughs] You know when the old colon gives you the elbow and it feels sorta cold inside, and you know all you hafta do is 'turn loose'? Well, this talking hit you right down there. A bubbly, thick, stagnant sound. A sound you could smell. This man worked for a carnival, you dig? And, to start with, it was like a novelty ventriloquist act. Real funny too, at first. He had a number he called 'The Better Oh', that was a scream, I tell you. I forget most of it, but it was clever, like, "Oh, I say, are you still down there, old thing? 'Nah, I had to go relieve myself!'"
  
[[You're A Hook. The 15 Year Anniversary Of Dial-A-Poem (1968-1983)]] (LP, Giorno Poetry Systems GPS 030, June 18, 1984 Reissue)
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After a while, the ass started talking on its own. He would go in without anything prepared and his ass would ad-lib, and toss the gags back at him every time. Then it developed sort of teeth-like, little raspy in-curving hooks, and started eating. He thought this was cute at first, and built an act around it. But the asshole would eat its way through his pants, and start talking on the street, shouting out it wanted equal rights. [audience laughs] It would get drunk, too, and have crying jags, nobody loved it, an'...and wanted.. and it wanted to be kissed, same as any other mouth.
  
[[Cash Cow. The Best Of Giorno Poetry Systems 1965-1993]]" (CD, Giorno Poetry Systems ESD 80712, April 13, 1993)
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Finally, it talked all the time, day and night. You could hear him for blocks, screaming at it to shut up, and beating it with his fist, and sticking candles up it. But nothing did any good, and the asshole said to him, "It's you who will shut up in the end, not me. Because, we don't need you around here any more. I can talk, and eat, AND shit". [audience laughs]
  
[[Category:Side Projects]]
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After that he began waking up in the morning with a transparent jelly, like a tadpole's tail, all over his mouth. This jelly was what the scientists call "un-D.T.", undifferentiated tissue, [FZ coughs] which can grow into any kind of flesh on the human body. He would tear it off his mouth and the pieces would stick to his hands like burning gasoline jelly, and grow there. Grow anywhere...on him... Grow anywhere on him, a glob of it fell...So, finally his mouth sealed over, and the whole head would have amputated spontaneous..
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Did you know there is a condition occurs, in parts of Africa, and only among negros, where the little toe amputates spontaneously?...
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...Except for the eyes, you dig? That's the one thing the asshole couldn't do, was see. It needed the eyes. But nerve connections were blocked and infiltrated and atrophied, so the brain couldn't give orders any more. It was trapped in the skull, sealed off. For a while, you could see the silent helpless suffering of the brain behind the eyes. Then, finally, the brain must have died, because the eyes went out, and there was no more feeling in them than a crab's eye on the end of a stalk.
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[Audience cheers and fade-out]
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==Players==
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*[[Biography|Frank Zappa]]
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==Records On Which This Song Has Appeared==
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*[[The Nova Convention]] (1978)
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*[[You're A Hook. The 15 Year Anniversary Of Dial-A-Poem (1968-1983)|You're A Hook]] (1984)
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*[[Cash Cow. The Best Of Giorno Poetry Systems 1965-1993|Cash Cow]]  (1993)
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==Notes About This Song==
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*See: [[The Nova Convention: Entermedia Theater, Dec 1978]].
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*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smn-FjuLelM The Talking Asshole] (YouTube)
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==CC Clues In This Song==
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[[Category:Side Projects|Talking Asshole]]
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[[Category:Tracks|Talking Asshole]]
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[[Category:Performances|Talking Asshole]]
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[[Category:1978|Talking Asshole]]
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[[Category:Spoken word tracks|Talking Asshole]]

Latest revision as of 13:08, 14 December 2021


Lyrics

(The following lyrics are from a recording of FZ reading from William S. Burroughs' novel Naked Lunch at The Nova Convention: Entermedia Theater, Dec 1978);

Master of Ceremonies [Identity unknown]: Just sending up for the great... uh, Frank Zappa.

[Audience cheers, mixed with some vague yells of "We want Keith"]...

FZ: Hiya. How you doin' tonight? Alright,...um, as you know...I'm not the kind of a person that reads books, I've said this before many times, I'm not fond of reading. But, I do. I have in the past made exceptions, and...uh, one of these exceptions was this part of...uh the...the book that, I'm sure you know, called Naked Lunch, [audience cheers] and I've received permission to read the part about The Talking Asshole. [audience cheers]

So...[audience cheers]...Before I do...uh, I've discussed with Mr. Burroughs - before we came out here - some of the details that led to the construction of this section of the book. I asked him where he got the idea for this part, and he said that it was derived from the ventriloquist scene in The Dead Of Night, if you know that film. And I had a little bit of trouble following that, for a moment there, until he made it all very clear to me by saying that... uh, it was like... uh, when you have a ventriloquist dummy and suddenly the dummy starts talking for you. And so, with that introduction, I start on page 132, and it goes like this [clears throat]...

Did I ever tell you about the man who taught his asshole to talk? His whole abdomen would move up and down, you dig? Farting out the words. It was unlike anything I ever heard. This 'ass-talk' had a sort of gut frequency. It hit you right down there, like you gotta go. [audience laughs] You know when the old colon gives you the elbow and it feels sorta cold inside, and you know all you hafta do is 'turn loose'? Well, this talking hit you right down there. A bubbly, thick, stagnant sound. A sound you could smell. This man worked for a carnival, you dig? And, to start with, it was like a novelty ventriloquist act. Real funny too, at first. He had a number he called 'The Better Oh', that was a scream, I tell you. I forget most of it, but it was clever, like, "Oh, I say, are you still down there, old thing? 'Nah, I had to go relieve myself!'"

After a while, the ass started talking on its own. He would go in without anything prepared and his ass would ad-lib, and toss the gags back at him every time. Then it developed sort of teeth-like, little raspy in-curving hooks, and started eating. He thought this was cute at first, and built an act around it. But the asshole would eat its way through his pants, and start talking on the street, shouting out it wanted equal rights. [audience laughs] It would get drunk, too, and have crying jags, nobody loved it, an'...and wanted.. and it wanted to be kissed, same as any other mouth.

Finally, it talked all the time, day and night. You could hear him for blocks, screaming at it to shut up, and beating it with his fist, and sticking candles up it. But nothing did any good, and the asshole said to him, "It's you who will shut up in the end, not me. Because, we don't need you around here any more. I can talk, and eat, AND shit". [audience laughs]

After that he began waking up in the morning with a transparent jelly, like a tadpole's tail, all over his mouth. This jelly was what the scientists call "un-D.T.", undifferentiated tissue, [FZ coughs] which can grow into any kind of flesh on the human body. He would tear it off his mouth and the pieces would stick to his hands like burning gasoline jelly, and grow there. Grow anywhere...on him... Grow anywhere on him, a glob of it fell...So, finally his mouth sealed over, and the whole head would have amputated spontaneous..

Did you know there is a condition occurs, in parts of Africa, and only among negros, where the little toe amputates spontaneously?...

...Except for the eyes, you dig? That's the one thing the asshole couldn't do, was see. It needed the eyes. But nerve connections were blocked and infiltrated and atrophied, so the brain couldn't give orders any more. It was trapped in the skull, sealed off. For a while, you could see the silent helpless suffering of the brain behind the eyes. Then, finally, the brain must have died, because the eyes went out, and there was no more feeling in them than a crab's eye on the end of a stalk.

[Audience cheers and fade-out]

Players

Records On Which This Song Has Appeared

Notes About This Song

CC Clues In This Song