The Infamous Shit-Eating-On-Stage Contest
Hard-dying rumors had it that Frank Zappa ate shit on stage. One of the possible reasons for the endurance of this fictional concept might be that in the mind of an average person a creative artist like FZ cannot be mentally sane. The same prejudice feeded the re-occuring unbelieving questions after his consumption of drugs.
"The other fantasy is that I once took a shit on stage. This has been propounded with many variations, including (but not limited to):
[1] I ate shit on stage.
[2] I had a 'gross-out contest' (what the fuck is a 'gross-out contest'?) with Captain Beefheart and we both ate shit on stage.
[3] I had a 'gross-out contest' with Alice Cooper and he stepped on baby chickens and then I ate shit on stage, etc.
I was in a London club called the Speak Easy in 1967 or '68. A member of a group called the Flock, recording for Columbia at the time, came over to me and said:
"You're fantastic. When I heard about you eating that shit on stage, I thought, 'That guy is way, way out there.' "
I said, "I never ate shit on stage," He looked really depressed—like I had just broken his heart.
For the records, folks: I never took a shit on stage, and the closest I ever came to eating shit anywhere was at a Holiday Inn buffet in Fayetteville, North Carolina, in 1973."
