Soft-Sell Conclusion

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For other versions of this song, see: Call Any Vegetable.


Lyrics

FZ: A lot of people don't bother about their friends in the VEGETABLE KINGDOM. They think, "Ah, what can I say? What can a person like myself say to a vegetable?" But the answer is simple, my friends: Just call ... and tell them how you feel ... about muffins, pumpkins, wax paper, caledonia, mahoganies, elbows and green things in general ... and soon: a new rapport! You and your new little green & yellow buddies... grooving together! OH NO! Maintaining your coolness together! Worshipping together in the church of your choice! Only in America! Woh-oh-oh-ah-agh-h ...

Call any vegetable
Call it by name
You gotta call one today
When you get off the train

Call any vegetable
And the chances are good
AR-R-H-R that the vegetable will respond to you!

FZ: Oh no! Can you see them responding? The pumpkin is breathing hard: huffa-puffa-huffa-puffa-huffa-puffa ...What a pumpkin!

Players On This Song

Records On Which This Song Has Appeared

Singles

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Zappa Albums & Side Projects

Tribute & Cover Albums

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Notes About This Song

  • Recorded at TTG, Los Angeles in November 1966.
  • This song was originally called "If You Like Chickens".

CC Clues In This Song